Transformed

The signs I make aren't perfect. In fact, they all have flaws in some way another...and with two kids under three underfoot while I'm painting, I'm amazed there aren't more. These 'flaws' used to bother me, but now I've come to embrace them (I've even put a disclaimer on my Facebook Page that my signs are 'perfectly imperfect'). Many people in the sign business use vinyl cutouts and stencils to make their signs perfect, and while I use some stencils to sketch out a lot of my signs, I think using vinyl and painting through stencils would take the fun out of it for me, and would remove a lot of the character from the pieces that hand-painting brings. More than anything, I love how they have been transformed from old, ugly, discarded doors and wood, into positive pieces of art that bring me joy to paint, and are even enjoyed by others. I realize that only using repurposed and reclaimed materials to paint on can limit my options, and sometimes I'm unable to do requests from customers because I don't have the supplies, but it's the transformation that happens with every piece that speaks to me every single time. 

I also see them as an expression of my journey. Next week will mark one year since  I heard the words "You have cancer." I can't believe the changes that have happened since then. Even today, my youngest turns 18 months old - a year and a half! And obviously I've gone through a physical transformation myself, and the mastectomy has most definitely left me flawed. Scarred. Disfigured. While my journey has been in some ways horrifying, I love how God has used it, and has continued to use my journey and me to help others who are facing it themselves. I have been made 'perfectly imperfect', to share God's love and peace with others. Most of my transformation is not visible to others, though - it's below the surface...my faith, peace and joy in the Spirit have all been strengthened stronger than they were before this part of my journey started.

I know some have wondered why I chose the name 'Mug Half Full' for my blog and business. It was taken somewhat from my love of coffee, and a play on the phrase 'glass half full'. But, it was also from a desire placed in my heart about three years ago to see the positive and beautiful in the broken and discarded - whether that was an old house or random material - and to help transform it. I also wanted to see God transform broken and discarded people, and to be used to help any way He saw fit. That's when I began to blog. I never dreamed then where this journey would take me, and when I started making signs after my recovery from surgery, I knew 'Mug Half Full Designs' needed to be the name. 

This coming week I have the privilege to have my signs available at Beulah Camp, and while I did not grow up attending the camp there, it was the place of some pivotal moments in my life where God transformed me...and He still continues to do so. I'm looking forward to a fun week with my girls and family, and catching up with some people I haven't seen in a while, and hearing stories about God's transforming power in their own lives.

Most of what I paint is straight from Scripture, or from songs that speak Truth to me. I'm forced to meditate and think on the words with every sign, and I love it. God's word is transforming, and it's my prayer that my signs help to speak those transforming truths into people's homes and lives.

I'm looking forward to being transformed more and more into the person He created me to be :)

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit

2 Corinthians 3:17-1 (NIV)

Praising, Potty training, Preaching, & Planning

I know, it's been a while. I seem to say that a lot, but sometimes life takes over, and sometimes you need to just 'be' without telling everything to the world. But I'm back now, and excited to share what has been going on.

Two days after my 'complicated biopsy' on my right side, I met with my oncologist, and she gave me these wonderful words...again: "no cancer". Just fibrosis and fat cells, haha (never thought I'd be happy about fibrosis and fat, but I am). I am so thankful to God for these results, and for those who have been continually praying for me and my family! I didn't know how relieved I would be to hear that until I did. I had come to terms that I would be having surgery either way: reconstruction, or lumpectomy/mastectomy again...but having the knowledge that there are no signs of that disease lurking in me is a comfort. My surgeon scheduled me for another MRI in October just to follow up again, on the recommendation of the radiologist, because it isn't typical for fat and fibrosis to show up during MRI's with the dye they use (not abnormal, just not typical) so they want to be sure...again. At least I know I am well looked after my the medical field :) 

I've also been potty training my 3-year old, which has been an adventure in itself. It's mostly a battle of the wills, as she know how to 'go' on the potty...we just have to wear her down now, haha. We have good days and bad days with this, but we are definitely moving forward.

On Mother's Day, I had the opportunity to share with my church family what God has been teaching me throughout the past number of years. Rather than writing out the highlights on here, I'll just post the link for the podcast: http://rvwc.podbean.com (May 10th - "Living With Great Joy and Expectation". Have a listen if you want :)

Reconstruction is still a "go" for the end of this summer. I am just waiting to hear from the doctor after the first of July to set up our next consultation. You may be wondering how the weight loss is going. It's going slowly. Very. Slowly. I'm still juicing some, watching my calories, and trying to up my exercise. I've decided that to get more motivated about this, I need a scale that is actually accurate, so we are going to come into the new age of technology and upgrade to digital. Hopefully that will take the guesswork out of where I am at on this whole journey. There is still time, but I need to kick it up a notch (and perhaps cut back on ice cream, haha)

I've been kept super busy with my signs, which is the main reason I haven't been blogging lately. So many customer orders! I'll need to put a hold on taking orders soon, as I will be having some of my signs at Beulah Camp in the Storehouse this year, and I'm very excited about that! Darren and I have also been working on the house here and there, and will be posting pictures soon on here. I also have some fun decor projects I'm excited to share!

One of the things I'm most excited about coming up in the next couple months, is a getaway with my sister to Moncton for a few days. We'll have spa time, go shopping, watch movies and just relax...with no kids. I am soooo looking forward to that, especially with more surgery looming for me shortly after.

So that's what's been going on with me. The next few months are sure to be busy, but i have a feeling there's going to be some great things to write about :)

How Are You Feeling?

I find I get asked that question a lot lately, especially from those who I haven't seen or talked to in a while. "How are you feeling?"

Truth be told, when it come to this disease that is/was in my body, I have always felt fine. There is no pain or really any symptoms associated with it. Yes, when I go through testing and biopsies I sometimes experience pain and uncomfortableness, and when I was recovering from surgery it was painful, and I was more tired than usual, and more susceptible to viruses...but I have since recovered. It truly is an 'invisible' disease I am fighting, and if I was not told I had it, it may have been quite a while before I realized it.

Most pain and sickness that is associated with cancer comes from the side-effects of chemo, radiation and pills that are taken as treatment. I have not needed any of these.  I hesitate to say that I feel 'blessed' that I have been spared from these treatments, as there are many dear people I know that are enduring these treatments right now with dignity and grace. My treatment has been surgery, and there still will most likely be more to come.

How am I feeling? I am feeling thankful. When you do see me, I will probably look tired. That is because of life. I am thankful that I am able to live my life with my little girls, who completely exhaust me...because they are little girls. The littlest one is teething, going through growth spurts, climbing, and is into everything - All. The. Time. The three year old is trying to potty-train, give up soothers, is becoming more independent and is testing her boundaries...daily. I get to spend my days with them, and soak in every moment. I am thankful that I am able to live my life with my husband. Last night we watched Jimmy Fallon lip sync battles and Thank you note segments on you tube and laughed until we cried. I get to do that with him. I am thankful that I had the opportunity to see dear friends in Newfoundland last weekend, which was my first time back in three years. I was able to catch up with loved ones and even see some beautiful scenery. I am thankful that my children have amazing Grandparents who they get to spend time with - they see Darren's parents weekly, and my parents are only a short drive away (we will get to see them this coming weekend) They are all wonderful influences in their lives and it means so much to Darren and I that they are able to be a part of it.

How am I feeling? I am feeling grateful. We've just come through Easter weekend, and I had the opportunity to help lead our church family through the promise of the Messiah during our Christian Seder meal on Good Friday, and we celebrated our risen Saviour yesterday. Jesus conquered death when He rose from the grave. He beat it. It is no longer a threat for those who believe in Him. Even though I do have more tests to be done - the next one being next Wednesday for a complicated biopsy during an MRI - I am not living in anxiety or fear. This life is not the end, and I am more convinced and committed than ever to spending my life doing what God asks of me.

1 Corinthians 15:54-58

54 Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled:

“Death is swallowed up in victory.
55 O death, where is your victory?
    O death, where is your sting?"

56 For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. 57 But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ.

58 So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.

When you believe...truly believe...that He is victorious over death, it is amazing how you will no longer be controlled by the fear of it.

Sometimes I can and do feel overwhelmed with things, and my emotions feel closer to the surface than before. Parenting can be hard. Working on strengthening your relationships can be difficult. Renovating an old house costs time and money. Getting my diet and exercise to where they need to be takes commitment. The thought of more surgeries...BIG surgeries...in my future can be discouraging. Owning and running a business can be daunting. Serving God when and where He asks is sometimes tiring. On Sunday, our Lead Pastor said that being people of God means that we "act better than our circumstances." This isn't something we do ourselves. I am not super-woman, and if I was left to myself, I would be a blubbering pool of fear and emotions. This can only be done by surrendering yourself to the daily filling and leading of the Holy Spirit. He is the one who helps me act better than my circumstances. I find I do have less control over my emotions now when in situations where I feel overwhelmed, and that's ok. (I like having control, so this is something new I am learning). I cry more easily, and I sometimes need to get by myself, take a big breath, pray, and regroup my thoughts. This is still a new journey I am on, and I am learning.

So, when you see me or talk to me, don't be afraid to ask me how I'm feeling. I appreciate more than you know that you care, and that you are praying and thinking of me and my family. 

But in case you were wondering, I am feeling fine...more than fine. I am thankful. I am grateful. I am alive, and I am confident in Him.

"Oh death! Where is your sting?

Oh hell! Where is your victory?
Oh Church! Come stand in the light!
The glory of God has defeated the night!

Oh death! Where is your sting?
Oh hell! Where is your victory?
Oh Church! Come stand in the light!
Our God is not dead, he's alive! he's alive!

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake!
Come and rise up from the grave
Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with him again
Come awake, come awake!
Come and rise up from the grave."

(Song: Christ is Risen - Matt Maher)